A little bit of life

Sometimes my thoughts and emotions just overwhelm me.  Sometimes that's why I can't write. Other times it's because I don't feel like I have anything to say. Who wants to read random thoughts, right? Then I get complaints, "Why haven't you blogged? You're behind on posts you know..etc" But I can't. I can't write a crappy post just for the sake of posting. Now though? NOW i'm in one of those moods where I HAVE to write. I have to get these jumbled up thoughts out no matter what they turn into. Apologies in advance ;)

Let's start with the fact that I have been so incredibly blessed with my host family. I can't even express what it's like to be here. Yeah, it's often a crazy mix of emotions and figuring things out. It's a 'do you just say "Bless you" when the two year old sneezes, or do you teach him to say 'Hamdelelah' because it's muslim tradition?' kind of situation. When the response to things is supposed to be: Thank God, God Willing, or God Bless what do I do? We aren't trusting/speaking to the same God..So I can't give the impression that I am..but it's rude. It's really not too difficult. It's not something that comes up as often as you'd think, but it does on occasion. Keeps me on my toes. :) Long story short though? I love these people. M is a very special friend during a special time in my life. I love that the two yr old, A, and I have our own bedtime routine. I love that K shares all the good things she did in school that day so I'll tell her I'm proud. I'm thankful that M and I are so on the same page about my place here. To replace no one, but to be a friend and tool in the training up of some amazing kids. Cookie taste tester has been added to my job description, and if you know me at all you already know this is hard. Not the eating part, but the critiquing. Today I got a lecture because I said the brownie cookie was nice even though it was slightly dry. haha..I'm learning to pay closer attention to detail, and not just with cookies :) All in all, I can hardly remember the awkward days when I first arrived. I'm now a functioning member of this foreign family!

I'm learning a lot about myself. It's kind of funny, but really eye opening. M often says she thinks i'm here for a bigger reason than just the kids. I'm here to find myself-as cliche as that sounds, I whole heartedly think it's true. I've been stripped away from everything I know. No family. No friends. No church. Just me and Jesus hangin out in the Middle East together. He's totally taking care of me. I'm being stretched and grown and it's incredible. Tomorrow I'm going to my new church for the 3rd week in a row. I have a couple "friends" who I catch up with all while meeting new people every week too. I enjoy and connect with the sermons. I'm adjusting to the style of worship. I'm thriving in the fellowship. Have you ever stood in the same place with people from ALL OVER THE WORLD singing and just worshiping the risen Christ? I have..and you're missing out if you haven't. I miss Redeemer. I miss the people who have supported me for most of my life. I miss my pastor. I miss my pew at the front of the sanctuary where there is little distraction and my family beside me. I love Redeemer Church..and I always will, but I feel like something clicked now that I'm at MCC. I can't explain it..just know that i'm good. Not only am I around other Americans, but I'm around other christians every week. and it's awesome. :) I'm hoping to get some Arabic lessons started in the next few weeks- all the locals I've met have told me I have a knack for the language. It would be pretty great to communicate better. Pray for guidance and a flexible schedule!

So my friends and family. I'm HAPPY. I'm exhausted most days- between nearly 12 hour days and the polluted air it's inevitable. But I love my work. I love the people I live with. I love the food(i've become quite adventurous with it by the way). This country, with all of it's history and heart ache and confusion is making its' way into my heart. They say once you take a drink from the Nile you always come back(or something like that) and I feel like after a few sips i'm already hooked. God is so good. I can't ever say that enough. Thankfully, I never have to stop. 

Amanda

oh. and Happy Birthday, Dad :) Miss and love you!!